Haunted: Three Years Later

I'm haunted by the thoughts of you and what you did to me. 

I'm haunted by the friends I've lost because of you. 

I'm haunted that you still exist in another part of the city, a city I call home. 

I am tired that I lost so much on that day that I will never be able to get back.  I am tired that three years later you still haunt me. 

My security is still gone. I am sure that I will never get that back. I accept what happened to me that night. It is a harsh reality.  I think back on several occasions on how the night could have been different.  So many variables, so many things that could have been different...so 'that' didn't have to happen to me, but it did.  I hate that I still run through what could of or should of happened that night.  

I hate that I ever called you a friend. A friend doesn't tear you to pieces. A friend doesn't inflict that kind of pain. A friend doesn't take advantage of you when you are not in any state of mind. A friend does not hurt you. 

I hate that you haunt me.   

I'm tired of you haunting me. 

I wonder if the things you did to me that night, do they haunt you? I know there is a God and I trust in him. And what I do know is that he is a just God.